Thai Yoga Massage

Ok people, I’m not really sure if I like the Thai Yoga massage…and maybe because yoga is actually challenging to me, so I don’t really find a massage that incorporates any sort of flexibility and restrictive moves to be relaxing in any capacity. It’s hard enough to even undergo a Shiatsu massage for me, which I suppose is a red flag that I am either choosing to ignore or am going to have to address later on…but back to the TYM review:

I booked an appointment at one of my favorite spas Burke Williams Sherman Oaks. I took my shower, sat in the hot tub for a while and was waiting in the quiet room in my fluffy BW robe. When the therapist called for me, she was wearing a gi and a martial arts style headband. I kind of wondered why my therapist was rocking a teenage mutant ninja turtles motif, but then thought that maybe I was being completely out of line and politically incorrect and just sucked it up to being ignorant and followed her to the room. On our way to the room, she asked if I had ever experienced an ‘eastern style massage” before – answer: no. Her response was that it was very ‘interactive’ and that I needed to ‘work with her’ to make it easier. Hmmm….ok.

We finally get to the room where there is a t-shirt and sweat shorts on a massage table that is on the floor. Size medium, which in the mainstream world, is really a size XS. She instructed me to put the clothes on and lay face down on the table. Ummmm. Ok. I started to change, and put on the ridiculously small t shirt and shorts, unsightly bulges popping out in ridiculous areas, and figured what the hell, at this point it’s pretty much do or die. She comes back in and begins her massage – stretching me, pressuring with her knees and elbows, full body at times, instructing me to breath and we do some sort of twisted yoga, stretching and whatever else. At the end of the hour, I was anything but relaxed, and even more pissed off that it was in the realm of $140 by the time you get done with the cost of the treatment, gratuity and valet. I think…no I know, that from now on, I will stick with the swedish style massage thank you very much.