Oh the pain of being beautiful…oh the agony of staying beautiful….I went to visit Dr. Marks yesterday for my first treatment of ‘Lunchtime Lipo” or Mesotherapy as it is medically called at the medi-spas that are popping up all over LALA-land. It’s targeted at the whole ‘fast paced i don’t have time for liposuction and I just want to pop into the spa and get it done and loose a pant size this summer” and indeed, it doesn’t hurt – the proceedure that is. I had plans of taking the day off, going to the medi-spa, getting some lipo done and maybe stopping by target on the way home – because I have a couple of loads of laundry to get done.

An hour later, I’m lounging in the reception area, making consecutive weekly appointments for my series of 6-8 sessions of Lipodissolve (and sure, why don’t we throw in some restalyne fillers in there too) to address my mid-section because after 30 it’s just hard to sculpt anything on your body…and so I linger around bs’ing with the girls and then hit the streets to continue on my day.

And then, just as I am driving down Sherman Way (which always reminds me of RollerGirl) this unbelievable pain sweeps the living daylights out of me. I feel like throwing up, I feel like crying and I feel like I am really insane driving at that particular moment. I called O and had him de-escalate me and get me focused on our convo so that I could not focus on the pain…and the drive just was sooooooo lonnnnng. and the day was sooooooooo lonnnnnnng. and painful. Thank God, Goddess and Puppies for cannabis oil extraction drops.

This morning I woke up swollen like I was 6 months pregnant. I still had a deadline for the box art today at noon, got it done AND came home and made some migas, AND took my ass to the studio to produce Blue@Night and I’m sitting here swearing I have to document this situation because Its just too good to pass up.

I’m tired, I’m thirsty and I’m swollen. more later.

I think I may actually be on the brink of my first official swap on MAU . For those of you who aren’t in the ‘know’, at MakeUpAlley.com you can write beauty reviews, post spending diaries and even swap items that you aren’t too crazy about for items that you want to test – run or try out. It almost seems like an online pajama party – but I will keep you posted on my merging into the swap-arena. If you want to look me up over there, my username is sylviag818.

I remember these crystal stick rock deodorants from wayyy back in the 70′s when they actually were in jagged rock formation. Now it’s way easier as they are in actual deodorant sized packaging – which lends to easy travel. The key is that you have to run the crystal under water to get it wet/smooth and then run it under your pits for odor control. Unfortunately it doesn’t do much for wetness control, and if you are an avid deodorant user, it may take a few days for your body to release the remaining chemical compounds from your previous deodorant usage.

The crystal rock deodorant stick is pretty dirt cheap and available at whole food stores or more organic stores – and it’s a PERFECT solution for dark tank tops/little black dress outings with guaranteed no white residue!

Greetings! My name is Chaia and I do a lot of beauty stuff at home. Partially because I’m cheap, partially because I’m crafty. I’ve gotten really good at some things and….not so good at others. I look forward to sharing my experiences here on Spa View.

The following is a cautionary tale:

They say that some lessons have to be earned to be learned. I believe I experienced such a lesson the time I decided to self-Brazilian. The financial tide was out and I couldn’t deal with the downstairs stubble, so I bought the Bliss Poetic Wax kit (about $40 at Sephora), figuring I’d just D.I.Y.M.P.

Gentle readers – Please believe me when I tell you that it is MUCH, MUCH less painful to get your bits depilated by a qualified professional than to take matters into your own hands. Knowing what I know now, I would have just spent that $40 on a visit to my regular esthetician (review coming soon, because she is five-star awesome). My hands were sweating and shaking, and I was actually whimpering from the pain – even on 800mg ibuprofen – but determined to see this project to completion. Worst of all, I was in such fear and pain that the process took an hour…six times as long as it takes when said qualified professional does it. An hour of horror.

Equally bad: The wax (blue colored) went EVERYWHERE. My bathroom was trashed; my manicure ruined; and I had to conduct a total Our Bodies, Ourselves-style full body cavity search in order to rid myself of the excess product. That said, the results were quite satisfactory; I’d followed the easy-to-understand, minimalistic directions to the letter – melt wax, cleanse skin, apply powder or oil, apply wax, rip off, scream, apply supplied soothing oils, take another painkiller – and ended up with smooth skin, if a traumatized psyche. The one thing that surprised me was how long it took for the wax to melt; it’s in a metal cup, so microwaves are out of the question and old-school double boiler action it is.

Satisfactory results aside, however, I would rather dress up in my favorite ensemble and spend an hour having chimpanzees pelt me with their feces than have to live through this ever again. There is a time and a place for frugality, but poon waxing is not it.

Stay Beautiful,

–Chaia

I have decided to write a continuous editoral for all of us chick-as and the few gay men who are fans of spa-view to bring awareness of treatments that are NOT ok to indulge in prior to a big event. I have had SO many friends & family who have endured unnecessary spa-trauma before big events and so with great joy, I bring you this forthecoming list:

1. NEVER wax your eyebrows or lip before a big event. Especially if you are not a frequent waxer. Two very close friends of mine have had traumatic experiences with the whole burn/bald wax sessions – and yes, one was a wedding. DRAMA! Best bet? Get your eyebrows waxed/shaped about a week before your event, then the night before your big day clean up any stray hairs with tweezers. It also helps alot to tweeze right after a shower when the steam has softened the hair follicles.

2. NEVER get a facial. Usually after getting a facial, your pores are all open and exfoliated/extracted which leads to redness and breakouts. It’s best to get a facial around 4 times per year and make sure you don’t have anything to do for at least 2 weeks to let your skin heal.

3. NEVER get an herbal wrap – usually the herbal wraps will help your body cleanse itself by removing toxins – which means lots of time on the toilet for the next 24-48 hours. Trust me – it’s not sexy!

4. Don’t get a deep tissue massage up to 4 days prior to needing to show skin. If you bruise easily, your body might have a potential to bruise after a good deep tissue massage. To relax before a big event, go for reflexology (way boring) or a good ol’ fashioned swedish massage – you can’t go wrong with that!

5. Botox – omg. this is probably the MOST important. First of all, it’s important to know how botox works – it really can be your best defense in looking fabulous after 35, but it can also be your worst enemy if not handled properly. I should totally do a whole section on botox alone – but for now, just know that it takes almost a week for it to ‘kick in’ – so the days after your treatment you kind of have a weird stretching feeling and red marks from the injections which might swell minorly in some people (I have super minor swelling)…and it also takes about a week or two to ‘settle down’ and get that ‘a HA!” look off your brows. Best advice I can give is to get it done on major down times during the year – a month prior to the holidays and a month prior to summer. More on Botox later. For now, just know it’s not something you should do before a bit event.

ok. I am sure this is going to be a recurring topic, as we live, learn and make mistakes all in the name of beauty.

L’Occitane – Lavender Harvest – Relaxing Foot Cream is the official name of this absolutely fabulous tube of bliss – and yes, I did actually pay $17 bucks for some lotion omg. But my reasoning was that I am not getting any younger, and I wanted to know what a 20$ foot cream felt like – and oh it is simply marvelous!! It truly is relaxing and smells amazing – and is not too greasy (like the burt’s bees feet grease) to where you will be sticking to your bedsheets. The bottom line? 2 thumbs up from sylG!